Well, my obsession with Courtney Love began in 1991-1992. She graced the cover of SASSY magazine with her boyfriend that had bright red hair and the best powdery blue mohair sweater I had ever seen, she had bleached messy hair that resembled Nancy Spungen and smeared lipstick , a look I had done since the eighth grade...I was naturally drawn to this look, maybe because my mom had it throughout 70's, the witchy look as my mother titled herself, I come from a long line of witches,but that's a whole other blog.
Regardless my nine years of dedicating wall space, ear noise, visual cosmetics to this woman that I had a passion and inspiration from came to a halt when she decided to start impressing the Hollywood crowd, the kept hair, designer dresses and meek persona really turned me off, though i respect what she was feeling I wasn't turned on by it, and you have got to remember she did get to hangout with Liz Taylor (yes I am jealous)...I have kept all my keepsakes Courtney has given me over the years: barrettes,cigarette butts and ribbons...
I have seen Courtney/Hole at least a dozen times since 1992, different line ups, same songs and the crowd always seems to get younger over the years? Or I guess I am just getting older?
Also I have close friends that have been close with Mz.LOve I've heard all the horror stories of deceit, mistrust and burnt bridges, yet I can't help but feel emotional and protective of her. Every encounter I have had with her, though brief have been very kind and sweet.
I Went and experienced the newest version of HOLE last night at BUMBERSHOOT in Seattle with Tracy Cilona,A FELLOW cOURTNEY loveR....
Courtney SHINED BRIGHT! it was her homecoming, she picked some goodies to play! Opening with Pretty on the Inside segueing into Rolling Stones...As soon as the first words came out of the Queens mouth I had an adrenalin rush and ran through the on-lookers like a 15-year-old girl, plowing through one of the most boring crowds i have ever witnessed at a concert. It seemed as though the crowd was frozen,and were only there to snap pics with their camera phones, evil eyes were on me for dancing and singing. Really Seattle, you are at a live show, there is rock music being played! Loosen up!!!!
The set was brilliant and tears welded my eyes into salty rivers twice! This woman still does it for me! I am close to 40 now and to have these feelings emulate through my being feels sooooo damn good!!!!!
Thank you Courtney for having balls, for speaking out of turn, bleeding infront of the world, expressing truth, being bad, being evil, getting whatever the hell you want, for having a fire burn inside you, thank you Courtney for being filled with so much passion! so much talent! creating another being, so much beauty, sometimes even ugly beauty, for putting your fist in the face of those surrounding you, thank you for those words you sing, thank you for publicly showing pain, and always dressing better than those other girls,for being a goddess and warrior, a whore a tramp an entity to reckon with.......
and in all honesty I really don't think that 1 percent of the population will or has ever "ached like u ache", and thus they will never understand what it's like to have to fight, bite , kick,scratch to keep their souls like you have!
Thank You Courtney!
xoxoox
forever + ever yours..
Miss Oblivious
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